Why does my husband get so angry that im a night owl?

So, I am a night owl. As in i stay up all night and sleep mostly all day.


The fact that i sleep doesn't bother my husband, but the fact that i stay up all night does I don't understand why it bothers him so much. We actually argue about it. Can anyone tell me why he gets so angry? I really don't get it.Why does my husband get so angry that im a night owl?
I am a true night owl. I have delayed sleep phase syndrome. If you have it too, your husband is going to have to get used to it, because YOU can never change. You can adjust your sleep pattern, but just one night of staying up late and you will have to ';reset'; again. Wikipedia has some information on it. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_sleep_phase_syndrome





I have been married to my husband for 20 years. He is used to my odd hours. He wakes up to find I have rearranged the furniture or cleaned the whole house or maybe have just been working (I work from home).





In the early days of our marriage I would compromise. I would go to bed so we could cuddle, then once he fell asleep I would quietly get up and go on with the rest of my evening. He's used to it now. He goes to bed at 11 and gets up at 7. I go to bed at 3 and get up at 9. We each have our normal, and he can no more force me to his schedule than I can force him to mine.





My first husband would get very angry at me. The slightest sound would wake him up and he would fly into a rage. He was angry because I could stay up late and seem to get by on less sleep than him - it frustrated him.





Talk to your husband, have him read the Wikipedia article if it applies to you. My husband understands it has nothing to do with him or how I feel about him, the plain fact is, if I go to bed at the same time as him I will lie awake for hours until my magic hour of 3:00am is reached, at which time I fall asleep.





True Night Owls are who they are, and those who love us have to learn to live with it, just as we have.Why does my husband get so angry that im a night owl?
I to am a night owl, but he doesn't care. What do you do all night play on the computer? May be he thinks you are talking to other men on line. Or he thinks you just don't want to be in bed with him. Try asking him why it bothers him so much. I like to be on line also, and I do talk to people , but that is all it is, talk. I spend lot of my time here answering questions. I love to give advise. So ask him , and let him know why you like being a night owl, I like it because I have been this way for over forty years, and it is hard to change your routine.


Good luck hope it gets better.
I get the same way with my wife and here's why:





She's choosing to stay up instead of going to bed with me. It's not that I think she should be in bed with me simply because I want her there. It's that I think she should WANT to be in bed with me more than doing whatever it is she does (normally watch TV or on myspace/facebook for a long time). It's a form of rejection, and if you're doing it every night...





Would it upset you if he continually chose to do something else rather than spend time with you?
I work a night shift, so I'm a night owl, too. But even on my days off, I still stay up late. My husband gets upset because he just wants to lay with his wife in bed. I used to be the same way when he worked the night shift and I was a stay-at-home mom. So I understand.





He just wants to hold you at night is all.


Feel special and wanted, missy.
When the cat is away, the mouse comes out to play... But one day the mouse asks itself, ';Why does the cat leave when he could be eating me? What is it that the cat is seeking when his food is right here at home?'; The mouse does not realize that the cat might be, say, getting nurtured or de-loused, and not a different meal. My point being is that it is human nature and part of him...
It could be a number of reasons. You should probably sit down and talk to him about it... be prepared to argue a little but keep it in check -- if there is something else bothering him you need to work through his anger and drill down to the truth of things. He might just miss you in bed at nights.
Lots of people like that intimacy of sleeping next to the person they love. Maybe he misses you being next to him. If it's a problem in your marriage, why don't you try going to bed earlier for a week to see if that solves things and works for you.
Do you work nights? Maybe you make noise?


Have you asked him why it bothers him so much?


Maybe he thinks you slip out of the house.


Maybe he wants to spend time with you or talk to you during the day but does not because he will wake you.


You really need to ask him about it.
My step dad is the same way with my mom. It's weird, I think it's because they cant sleep as well if your not there. I work nights and when I'm at work my boyfriend sleeps on the couch. When I'm home he sleeps in bed with me. Its a security thing I think.
He wants to be with you and do everything with you, but you're just not there :(


He loves you :)
do you do anything else besides sleep? have a job?
Maybe he likes being in bed with you.
well am not married or anything but i say he wants to maybe snuggle or maybe uh do other things ....
maybe he wants to hold you while he sleeps and you're not there
go to bed