How can I raise a normal child even if my husband and I are separated and on shared parenting arrangement?

How can I raise a normal child (not troubled) even if my husband and I are separated and on shared parenting arrangementHow can I raise a normal child even if my husband and I are separated and on shared parenting arrangement?
The situation is rarely the problem with the child, it is usually the people that are involved. As weird as it sounds you need to try and raise your child as close to how they would have been raised if yu guys were still together as you can. By that I mean, if the kid comes home with an F on his report card you have to say something like ';We are calling your father tonight to discuss your school habits and see what kind of punishment we can come up with. The child has to still think of you as his parents...not just mom's house and dad's house.





Talk with your ex, agree to the same bed time at both houses. Agree to set certain rules, like a curfew time, allowance, when and if they are allowed to get their driver's permit.





In some situations this is not possible because one parent is VERY bad at being a parent, or the weekend parent just wants it to be all fun and games at their house. But the way separated parents have messed up kids is because there is a different way to be at mom's house vs. dad's house. It gets especially bad when one parent bad talks about the other parent. This confuses the kid and makes them feel like they HAVE to act like they dislike that parent too, or you may not love them any more. It sounds stupid, but we are talking about children's minds.





Just do your best to act like friends instead of two opponents with your child as the prize.How can I raise a normal child even if my husband and I are separated and on shared parenting arrangement?
Be friends with your ex as much as possible. Never talk bad about your ex, regardless of how much you want to. In short, hold yourself to a higher standard than anyone else expects of you. Try to get your ex to hold to those standards as well.





Have a good relationship with your ex. Teaching your child that even though people disagree they can still be friends. That will be the most important lesson you can teach in this situation.





Granted, it may not be possible as it takes two people to put aside their animosity for the good of their children. Please be one of them though as one is better than neither. :)
You need to keep his schedule as close to what it was before you separated. Shared? What does that mean? 50/50? Does it mean that he gets him every other weekend? Personally, I don't think 50/50 is good for a child. Lives one week with mom, one week with dad. I mean, imagine if you had to change houses every week? Would you like it? No, you would feel like neither place was your home. Don't talk bad about your husband, keep thinks happy around the house and stable, don't show the child you are stressed out, mad, or sad.
Of course you can if you have your rules and set boundaries. It would be better if you and your husband have the same goal about how to raise your kid.
By both of you being the best parents you can be and putting the child first.
With much difficulty!